I Am Done Believing
| Sorry for the language, but I am forewarning you ahead of time. I have finally resolved in my beliefs that this fucking Roller coaster ride we are on is NEVER going to end. I have finally resolved we are destined to live 100's of miles apart. I use to believe I would have sometime frame of when it would end. I use to believe I would have some inclination as to when he may be home. I wish everyone would stop asking because I have no FUCKING CLUE. But now.......I ALSO HAVE FUCKING GIVEN UP. I JUST GIVE UP I have decided I am going to live my life realizing, I have a husband whom I may someday live with before I die. For those few of you that still check in from time to time, Sniper is being Medically Retired from the Marine Corps. Well at least he is in the process. A process that can take months, many long months or even years. And in that process I have realized he (and most that have gone through this) is just going to have to bend over and take it in the ass with what they give (or lack there of) him as a rating. It makes me physically sick, to see how much he has sacrificed (15 1/2 years), continues to sacrifice for this Country, only to get shit on, on the way out. A big fat fuck you, I mean thanks for playing we are done with you. I am beyond frustration at this point. I am beyond understanding. I am beyond being optimistic. I am beyond having a positive attitude. I am just beyond anything at this point. So, yes I am DONE and BEYOND believing anymore. Dyzgoneby Sniper, I am love you with all my heart and that will never change. And get it out of your head, I will never leave you. You are stuck with me here, now and into eternity. I am just done believing in anything anymore. |
posted by dyzgoneby at 7/29/2007 09:57:00 AM
Comments on "I Am Done Believing"
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Unknown said ... (10:44 AM) :
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dyzgoneby said ... (11:08 AM) :
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Stacy said ... (5:48 AM) :
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kbug said ... (9:53 PM) :
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AFSister said ... (8:01 PM) :
post a commentDyz, I of all people can understand the frustration of not knowing what is going on. It will happen, you'll be together. It's just hard when you can't day dream about the joy since you just don't know when you'll be able to experience it. Umm, may I say again, after having had the opportunity to talk to him about my kid, there are so many things clearer. You both are so lucky to have each other and the time will come when joy happens. Oh, and Sniper, thanks for being the best fertilizer my dumbass (his dads name for him, not mine) kid could have. You're the spirit of what the Corps should be, not PC crap. You really did get them all home safe.
Loriann, Thank you for everything. You really have helped me more than you will ever know. I truly enjoyed talking to you the other night. I didn't realize how much I needed that as much as you. I am glad Sniper was able to help you and your son. Thank you again.
Aww Dyz, I'm always here for you guys. I've missed you.
I am sure the long process is very difficult. There are no words that I can say to make it any better I am sure, but please know that we are all here for you to vent your frustrations on.
I will keep you both in my thoughts.
nothing so say without spewing some bad words along side you...
sending a lot of love to you and sniper (((((hugs)))))
love,
your ladybug friend
It must truly seem like the two of you will never have a real life together...just remember how long you were apart before you found each other again. Hang in there, girl...sending hugs your way..... :)
damn it, Dyz... I feel your pain. My Man is now 500 miles away from me instead of 1000, so he's getting closer- but until he's 5 feet from me, it just won't be enough.
And, like you, I have no idea when that will be.
Unlike you, he's not being toyed with by the military though. Instead he simply can't find a job here in Cincinnati.
It sucks. It just sucks bad. I hear your pain, and I feel it. Your frustration is mine too.
We just have to stay strong, confident and determined. Hell, look at us- we're both hard-headed, so we can be hard-headed about this too, right????