Stupid Fucking Cell Phone Policy

My office recently implemented a new policy. Cell phones must be put on vibrate while at work. I understand this one. I work in a fairly large office with cell phones ringing constantly. There are a few people who just don't get it and there phones ring constantly and are very loud. It's irritating to know end. I personally turn my ringer way down, so as not to disturbe anyone. Since we started this, I carry my phone when I leave my desk, which is constantly. When I am sitting down, I sit on it. However, I knew this policy was going to bite me in the ass and it did. I come into work this morning in my happy cheerful self. It's another good day I thought. Maybe Sniper will call I'm thinking. I was very busy (which is completely normal) and needed to pick something up from the printer. It's about 15 feet away. I didn't think twice about leaving my phone at my desk. I sat back down and looked at my phone. 1 MISSED CALL. My heart just sank. I looked at the area code and sure enough it was Sniper. FUCK!!!! I looked to see what time he called, 0829. I checked the time, 0830. Fuck...... Please call back, please call back. I kept saying it over and over again. It's been 9 days, I just want to hear your voice. I sat there and willed that damn phone to ring. This fucking stupid cell phone policy. 0839, no call back. Sniper always calls me back when I have missed a call. No, this isn't the first time, but he always calls back. My eyes start to leak a little. Damn Stupid Fucking Cell Phone Policy! I am actually talking to my cell phone and begging for it to ring. I didn't care that people were around me. 0844, Still no call back. I grabbed the phone and walked out of the office. Please call. OK maybe he called someone else in the family and they were home. Bubba's home, he didn't have to be at school until 1130. Please have called Bubba. Oh God, let him call me back. I clean up my face and go back into the office. By now those around me know I missed a call. They all kept saying he'll call back.....WHEN? Gunny (my boss and retired from the Marine Corps) comes over and gives me a hug. He hands me a Starbucks Muffin. Eat-up. He'll call back. No worries. 0855, still no call back. Well, at least I know he tried. At least I know he is thinking of me. I sat down and tried to do some work. I am way buried and I need to get the shit on my desk done. My mind was racing with missing that phone call. I am having a hard time concentrating on my job. I look down at my hands and they are shaking uncontrollably. My whole body was shaking. I was crying from the inside out. My insides felt like they were ripping apart. I know it's a fucking phone call, he'll call back. It's not the end of the world, but my heart wasn't listening to my head. 0925, still no call back. He is definitely talking to someone else. Oh please have let him get a hold of Bubba (Bubba hasn't talked to him since Boots on the Ground). I finally started to resolve myself and realize he tried. 0944, My phone rings. I had been holding it in my hands wishing it to ring. It was Sniper. He wanted to call and tell me he loves me. We talked for all of 5 minutes. He was able to talk to Bubba and his mom for over an hour. That made me feel so good. I am really happy Bubba heard from him. Sniper was sooo extremely tired. He only had about an hour and a half left to sleep. He was very quiet on the phone. I could hear him, in the short amount of time we were on the phone, falling asleep. Me - Honey, you need to get some sleep. I worry about you. Sniper - What are you worried about? Me - Honey you need your sleep. Sniper - But I want to talk to you. Me - Honey, you are falling asleep. Besides I don't want to pay for a phone call to listen to you sleep. I would rather actually talk to you. Sniper - very quiet Me - Honey, I am hanging up now. Your falling asleep. Sniper - Um, ok. We hung-up a minute later. I want to talk to him, but he has a job to do and needs his rest. I am very happy I was able to talk to him. All I wanted to do was hear his voice. Those five minutes were so precious. Even if I mostly listened to his breathing become deeper and deeper as he was falling asleep. Up until I missed that phone call, I was doing great. In the 1 hour and 15 minutes, my life sucked. I wasn't depressed, just sad that I missed it the first time he called. Looking back, I am glad I missed that call. Why? He was able to talk to his son and his mom. They needed to hear from him way more than I did. I did call his mom and talk to her afterwards. I wanted to find out how he was doing. We both have kept each other updated whenever and whoever he calls. She did tell me I need to chill out when it comes to not hearing from him. Damn him. I knew he would get me used to phone calls and then cut me off. I didn't think I was that affected by not hearing from him until I missed that call. I will say this....THAT STUPID CELL PHONE POLICY IS GOING OUT THE FUCKING WINDOW WITH ME. I will not, will not miss another call. If you wonder why I am telling you about this crazy episode. I used to wonder what was perfectly normal, to have your feelings all over the board. I would hear about the rollercoaster ride you become part of and wonder what it was like. Is it really that big of a ride? No, I am not nuts, well maybe somedays. Sharing my experiences may give someone else the insight as to: one, how emotional the ride truly is (no matter how strong you maybe); two, what you experience is perfectly normal and three, no matter what, love does conquer all. Bouncing on the bed.....I heard from Sniper. I am good for at least another 9 days. dyzgoneby 366 days until I can throw my cell phone in the garbage. Why? Sniper will be in my arms then.